The Self-Parenting 12 Steps
By Patricia O’Gorman Ph.D., and Phil Diaz, M.S.W.
excerpted from The 12 Steps to Self-Parenting (HCI, 1988)
Step 1 | Admitted our powerlessness to change our past — that our lives had become unmanageable and became willing to surrender to our love and not to our fear. |
Step 2 | Find hope in the belief that recovery is possible through faith and an acceptance of the fact that we are never really alone. |
Step 3 | Learned to let go of compulsive self-reliance by reaching out to our Higher Parent. |
Step 4 | Made an honest assessment of our strengths and weaknesses and accepted the impact our childhood had had upon us as adults. |
Step 5 | Learned to share our self-parenting issues with others without self-recrimination or shame. |
Step 6 | Become ready to change by giving up the demand to be perfect. |
Step 7 | Learned to embrace our uniqueness and connectedness to others in a spirit of love and humility. |
Step 8 | Learned self-forgiveness and made amends to our inner child. |
Step 9 | Healed our inner child by realizing the promises of self-parenting in our daily life. |
Step 10 | Practiced daily self-acceptance and learned to live in the present. |
Step 11 | Allowed the divinity in us to shine forth by surrendering to our Higher Power. |
Step 12 | Having had this spiritual awakening, we reached out to others in the spirit of giving, love and community. |